US Markets - Five Points
US markets are flattish on light news.
Any discussion about the Dow Jones Index is dumb because it’s not market-cap-weighted. Most recently, you had UnitedHealth Group singlehandedly responsible for an 805-point decline in the index. Don’t bother reading articles that cite the Dow.
My nephew’s school has a cluster of what I have christened the “illiteratai”—a band of overdiagnosed teenagers. The school’s sales pitch to jittery parents is: Hand over some $ and we’ll turn your ADHD gremlin into a functioning human. Half the kids are buzzing on prescription drugs, and the other half’s families would rather outsource their personalities. I intended to relay a hilarious story about one of them, but after writing this, I just wanted to hug the poor kid.
Another nephew story. One of his friends was expelled for writing something even a far-right libertarian would grimace at. Unfortunately for the school, the parents of the expelled student went through all of his group chats. And took screenshots. “Republicans should have their intestines pulled out and be put in concentration camps,” that sort of thing. Boom, 10 more kids are suspended, with an unknown number to follow. The story’s moral is: Teach your kids to be responsible online citizens because their digital footprint is permanent.
I’ve always liked historical novels and found a new author, Conn Iggulden. An excerpt from his series on the Greek city-states:
'Gentlemen, I congratulate you,' Eurybiades said. He stood before them, wide-shouldered and stern as any tutor.
'Is there wine, Eurybiades?' Themistocles asked suddenly, perhaps just to be difficult.
'We used the last of it to wash wounds,' Eurybiades said with a shrug. He opened his mouth to continue, but Themistocles went on immediately.
‘What? My dear boy, you should have let me know! I would have brought you some, if only for me to enjoy now. The thought of going in again without a skin or two tomorrow... I won't be able to enjoy it if I think of you Spartans without even a drop of wine, I tell you.'
Eurybiades blinked slowly as Themistocles rattled on. The Spartan had never understood his Athenian counterpart. On that night, it was no more than a token effort. Themistocles was almost too weary to argue. Xanthippus saw him smother a yawn when he stopped talking. The Spartan navarch only stared, considering.
‘If you have an excess... I would welcome a few skins,’ Eurybiades said slowly. 'Perhaps you can send your boat back before morning. That is not why I called you here, however.'
Xanthippus saw Cimon lean forward like a hunting hound as the Spartan went on. He sat straighter himself, while sleep washed along the shore of him, threatening to pull him under.
The little cabin was too warm, that was the trouble... He came awake when Themistocles reached across and tapped him hard on the forearm without looking around. The Spartan went on.
‘I have had word from my own people. King Leonidas has taken position in the only pass through the mountains. He will hold it against the Persians as they come.'
'Can he block it?' Themistocles said sharply. 'The only pass there is the path along the coast. I know it well. It is a little wider than I would have liked, but if the Spartan army has chosen to hold there, perhaps it will serve. Have they sent word to Aristides and the hoplites marching out of Athens?' To their surprise, the Spartan did not reply immediately.
Eurybiades looked irritated and chewed one side of his lip in a manner less certain than Xanthippus had seen in him before.
'According to the messenger, King Leonidas does not have the full army with him. He has only his personal guard and some thousands of ... others, allies and helots.'
There was a beat of silence before Themistocles asked the question.
'Why?'
'The army cannot march during the feast of Apollo."
'We celebrated that feast a week ago, in Athens,' Themistocles said, his voice higher than usual. 'But your king has taken just a few thousand against the entire Persian army?'
'He gave his word, Eurybiades said. 'If Leonidas had to stand there alone, he would.'
